tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-65942246134870637802023-11-15T09:11:06.734-08:00Baclofen Therapy for AlcoholismInformation related to the study of Baclofen for the treatment of alcoholism, along with my own experience using Baclofen therapy in an attempt to cure my severe alcohol dependence.Jonhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09427150728702226694noreply@blogger.comBlogger24125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6594224613487063780.post-29184087192409075102015-12-07T09:35:00.000-08:002015-12-07T09:35:47.671-08:00Another UpdateThings have been going much better since that awful evening. I think having such a horrible experience woke me up to the fact that I absolutely never want to fall back into that pattern of alcoholic behavior. I didn't drink all week until Friday night, and on Friday I was the "designated driver" and only had two drinks in the course of a few hours. Saturday I had a few drinks as well, but again nothing major. I have had no desire to drink alone, and my one rough encounter has steeled my resolve in drinking responsibly. Life is extremely busy, which often helps me stay out of trouble.<br />
<br />
Anyways, didn't have much to say today, just wanted to give an update so things weren't left on such a depressing note. Things are going much better! It has been almost two months since I returned to drinking, and I have been able to maintain controlled drinking aside from that one night. Things are going well and I am looking forward to the future!Jonhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09427150728702226694noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6594224613487063780.post-61621725759195019992015-11-30T21:13:00.000-08:002015-12-07T09:36:08.469-08:00Hmmm...Well, things had been going pretty well, but I had a one-night binge last night. Sundays have been notoriously challenging for me; always having work that needs doing and having tons of free time. I drank alone, which is something I told myself I would not do under my new rules. Not sure what happened.<br />
<br />
I woke up feeling absolutely terrible. I don't even understand how I was drinking like that every day before. The world felt so much smaller, and once again I felt helpless and trapped. I am glad that I did that, though, because it showed me what I value in life. I am in a great relationship with a person I love, and I have money and a job and good grades and family. I refuse to throw it all away for <i>that </i>feeling. Being incredibly hungover is one of the worst feelings imaginable because there is no escape from it. It horrified me, and I will never go back to that place in my life.<br />
<br />
If anything like that happens again I am going to quit drinking again for good. I am definitely not drinking alone, and I will find things to occupy my time on Sundays. I worked all day and felt terrible all day. I still feel pretty crappy almost 24 hours later. It's so bizarre because my drinking felt more like a compulsion than any real desire. I am starting to think that alcohol problems are the result of OCD or something similar. I still don't buy the disease model because that term is so vague.<br />
<br />
Anyways, figured I should be honest about my experiences so far. Last night's experience scared me, and I will use it to propel me forward.Jonhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09427150728702226694noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6594224613487063780.post-7477715356747550022015-11-24T21:09:00.002-08:002015-12-07T09:36:50.476-08:00Can't ComplainHey world (or the two or three people who stumble upon my now awkwardly-named blog),<br />
<br />
Things have been going well for the most part. For the past few weeks I have been drinking on the weekends. I have still only been "drunk" once since returning to drinking, but I have noticed some strange behaviors. It seems fairly obvious that my relationship with alcohol is unusual; while drinking I notice strange things like the fact that I think about how many drinks I should have, or could have, or where to go next, or whether or not what I'm doing is OK. I am still attempting to train myself to get over these doomsday ideas about alcohol and drinking, but it is challenging. I haven't drank since Saturday (it's Tuesday), and I told my significant other that I want to avoid alcohol for the next couple weeks while I finish up school. We'll see how that works out.<br />
<br />
I have noticed some mildly alarming signs, but I do also see room for hope. While I occasionally desire alcohol, it is not difficult to resist the urge to drink. I can even stop drinking once I've started as long as I am sort of socially pressured to do so. I can also stop on my own, but the desire is stronger because I think I can "get away with it" or something. I am trying not to drink alone at all. I have also noticed that I don't like to have alcohol at home because it just makes me feel weird. I am not ruling that out forever, but at this stage in my recovery from recovery I am not ready for it.<br />
<br />
The Holidays are coming up soon, so that will be an exciting new challenge. I am extremely stressed due to work, school, and the looming cloud of graduate school applications haunting my dreams like a fanged clown with a sledgehammer (sorry, weird stuff). I feel free. But I also feel fear. I am afraid to alter my life in any significant way because I'm afraid that I will descend into uncontrollable drinking. I am afraid to stay stagnant and create a "family" and "roots" in this weird town where I've existed for a few years. I am afraid of failure, and that fear almost drives me to give up, which would be a failure. Strange irony there. Well random stranger from the internet, keep tuning in if you want!<br />
<br />
For anyone who is struggling with alcohol -- fear not! The mind is incredibly powerful. It just needs time to heal, and more important than time, it needs <u style="font-style: italic;">reasons</u> to heal. We have the power!<br />
<br />
Happy Thanksgiving.Jonhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09427150728702226694noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6594224613487063780.post-66375767565464248882015-11-16T18:10:00.001-08:002015-12-07T09:36:50.474-08:00Update #3I really should update this more often. It's as if I'm afraid to discuss my drinking, afraid to jinx my success or reveal my failure or mention anything at all. I would say I've been successful to this point, but I have noticed a couple troubling patterns. I notice that I now really look forward to having some drinks on the weekend, and I try to persuade my partner to end up places where alcohol will be present. I have still only been really drunk once, and I have stayed at about 2-3 drinks per night on the weekends. I drank alone (2 beers) for the first time last night, and I didn't like that at all. For some reason my thinking was different when I drank without anyone to hold me accountable for my actions. It felt way too familiar, and a little unsettling. So things have not been bad at all, but I have noticed some things that are causes for mild concern. Or perhaps I'm only concerned because I have been so deeply programmed to be concerned. Perhaps if I could just unlearn everything I was taught about alcohol and my relationship with it, everything would be different. Unfortunately we will never be able to know that.<br />
<br />
Anyways, life is going pretty well. I don't drink on the weeknights, and have only been drinking roughly two nights per week. It has been one month since I started drinking again. My job is going well, and I'm looking forward to the upcoming holidays and my graduation from college. I have noticed that my thinking has been different recently, though. I am paranoid and concerned that my life will fall apart, and I don't want anyone I care about to be near me if it happens. This part is surely the conditioning, the repetition and the ruthless commandments that all will be lost if I ever return to drinking anything. Ever. But I must work hard at re-wiring my brain and making sure I believe I have agency in my life. I want it more than anything in the world, and I will work tirelessly to achieve that goal.<br />
<br />
Ultimately, I need to continue to be honest about my drinking and decide for myself if it is worth the perceived risks. I just hope that if it does start to get problematic that I can prevent it. I do not condone the 100% anti-science approach. Alcohol problems obviously exist, and it is obviously not entirely behavioral. But I do believe the severity of alcohol problems often increase as a result of exposure to confrontational 'treatment' models. Which is what definitely happened to me. So I am working to reset my brain and to overcome the traumatic conditioning I have received over the years. It is no easy task. I just view alcohol differently now, I treat it like some living thing that can consume me and turn me into a zombie. I will succeed in being happy and choosing my own path.<br />
<br />
I choose my own path.Jonhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09427150728702226694noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6594224613487063780.post-46763918332708237032015-11-03T20:37:00.000-08:002015-12-07T09:36:50.469-08:00Update #2It's difficult to find time to write. Let's see...last Friday night I had two drinks. Then the next day, Halloween, I got wasted for the first time since drinking again. I was with my significant other, and we went out to a bar where the bartender served extremely stiff drinks. I was dressed up as a slutty Robin, and though I had about 4 drinks, each of them was probably a double, so I would guess it totaled somewhere between 8-10 drinks for the night. The next morning I felt terrible--the familiar fog and thumping mental pain and achy body--and I didn't feel better all day. Alcohol is really a pretty weird drug. And yes I know it would seem that I am headed down a bad path. But it was a holiday, and I never know how much of my psyche has been irreparably altered by repeated doomsday talk. All I know is I haven't drank since then and I haven't wanted to. Well, maybe I've wanted to a little, but nothing major. The point is that, for now at least, choice still remains.<br />
<br />
My mind is a frightening place. I often think about dropping everything and just driving for hours and hours until I end up in some unknown place, left to figure my life out anew. I will occasionally Google different cities all over the world and contemplate what it would be like to live there, alone, and to build my life there. Or perhaps it would be where my life would crumble into whatever weird pieces survived. I have been told so many times that what I'm doing--drinking again--is going to kill me, that it is almost impossible to avoid these apocalyptic, hyperbolic ideas. I am starting to become convinced that the conditioning we subject addicts and alcoholics to plays the biggest factor in their fucked up lives. From an early age we (society, treatment, doctors, 12-step) tell people they have "crossed a line" and they are now permanently fucked, as if we <i>actually </i>know that for a fact. I'd say about 95% of the time no brain scans are done, no actual science takes place. All of these diagnoses are the result of mere observation and opinion. I have seen, and experienced, the destructive, world-wrecking power of the self-fulfilling prophecy. And now that I have the choice to drink or not, I'm considering quitting on my own simply because I like living life with the guarantee that I won't end up in a really bad place due to alcohol or drugs.<br />
<br />
I don't have time to write much more tonight. In other life, my lease expires soon and I will have to make the decision whether to move in with my partner or not. Ugh. I still have an instinctual response to run, I think because I am convinced that I am fucked forever and I am a time-bomb and no one should be close to me. Thanks 'doctors' for all of your help.<br />
<br />
P.S. - How do doctors explain food addicts recovering? A person who is 'addicted' to food, or sex, or shopping, MUST learn to moderate because those are aspects of life. If you are a doctor--and when I say doctor I do NOT mean any person who has been corrupted by 12-step theology--then please reply with an explanation for food addicts and recovery. Thanks.<br />
<br />
Goodnight! I'll keep you posted, and fingers crossed that my life doesn't fall apart ;-)<br />
<br />
<br />Jonhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09427150728702226694noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6594224613487063780.post-44181031429754156902015-10-25T14:01:00.004-07:002015-12-07T09:36:50.467-08:00UpdateHey anyone,<br />
<br />
As anyone who read my last post would probably have guessed, I drank a couple weeks ago for the first time in quite a while. I was tired of feeling cornered, boxed in, and afraid to live my life. I knew for a fact that at least half of my alcohol dependence was due to my exposure to treatment; prior to being introduced to rehab, 12-step 'treatment' and abstinence-only models, my drinking was harmful, but not extreme. Post-rehab, however, my drinking was completely out of control. I have also always had trouble with the disease model and the chronic/progressive/irreversible ideas related to addiction. So anyways, a little over two weeks ago I chose to drink again. I had one beer, and it was good. The all-too-familiar feelings returned, and I felt warm, slightly foggy, and not as sharp as I had been used to being. I had only the one beer, and I did not really want another since I had chores and work the next day. It was so anti-climactic--the biggest thing my return to drinking showed me is that it wasn't necessarily alcohol that I wanted so badly, it was the <u style="font-weight: bold;">freedom to choose it.</u> I thought to myself, "wow what was the big deal? Alcohol really isn't that special." I had forgotten that all alcohol does is make your brain feel a little fuzzier, everything else is the same. You are in the same room with the same people doing the same things.<br />
<br />
I drank for the second time this past Friday night. I had four drinks over the course of about three and a half hours. I never felt "drunk" or sloppy, and I woke up with no hangover. I have been adopting and implementing moderation management techniques for my drinking. No more than one drink every 30 minutes, no more than 3-4 drinks in a night, no more than two nights per week, no drinking alone, in the mornings, etc. My experience on Friday was somewhat of an eye-opener. For over a year I had been occasionally going to bars but never drinking, and I always felt left out. <i>If only I had alcohol in my system, </i>I thought, <i>then I would fit in and everything about this situation would be perfect! </i>However, as it turns out, that is not the case. I still felt slightly out of place and uncomfortable. I think I have just changed as a person, and I am not satisfied just sitting around at a bar chatting about nothing and roughly grabbing one another's shoulders and saying in a loud, drunken voice, "I care about you bro!" I did notice that after about my third drink I had a slight return of cigarette cravings. I haven't had a cigarette in about 10 months, so that was a little disconcerting. Turns out alcohol wasn't the cure-all I had imagined in my mind all of those months sober, but it feels really nice to have the freedom of choice back.<br />
<br />
Part of me is afraid, though. Alcohol has just had such a damaging effect on my life in the past, that it's almost impossible to shake the feeling off and to unlearn the conditioning I spent tens of thousands of dollars having programmed into me. It still makes me so mad that we spend thousands upon thousands of dollars paying for rehabilitation and all we get is some therapy, an AA book, and 12-step meetings. I can obviously see why they do it, though. What treatment center would spend tons of money giving its patients expensive medication, costly evidence-based individual therapy and psychiatry sessions, and state-of-the-art technology when they could charge just as much and simply let AA members come in for free and host a meeting? The part that makes me sick is that it's almost 2016 and no one has called them out on it. It needs to change, because people are dying.<br />
<br />
Anyways, I will keep the internet posted on my progress (or lack thereof). I see the risks of drinking. Part of me is convinced to quit again right now just because alcohol actually isn't that great. I will see how it goes, though. For now, my drinking is perfectly under control and I am showing no signs of dependence or harmful drinking. Fingers crossed. This is my experiment to the world. For better or for worse, I will get to the bottom of this alcohol business.Jonhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09427150728702226694noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6594224613487063780.post-34788914662665883432015-10-12T21:07:00.000-07:002015-12-07T09:36:50.464-08:00Over a Year Sober, but QuestioningWell, I apologize to anyone who attempted to contact me. I once again completely forgot about this blog, but will update with my most recent progress. By the way, finding a doctor to prescribe baclofen for the purpose of craving cessation is just a matter of perseverance. Many doctors are stuck and plagued by 12-step dogma and the idea that there is only one way to overcome addiction. And that is a harmful message that destroys lives. Doctors who fail to treat patients with the best available medications and treatments should be ashamed of themselves.<br />
<br />
I no longer take any medication. I quit baclofen about two months ago, and I quit Wellbutrin roughly two weeks ago. Life has been very good. I haven't had a cigarette in over nine months, and it's been almost 13 months since I've drank or used any recreational drugs. I have entered into a committed relationship, and I'm still doing well in school. I now work full-time and I'm in excellent physical health. I take daily vitamins and fish oil and other healthy natural supplements that I believe have expedited my physiological recovery. My life has completely changed, and I still credit that largely to baclofen.<br />
<br />
Baclofen seems like a distant memory. I crave alcohol occasionally, but it isn't difficult to avoid it. I go to bars with friends and just order a Coke or something. It's really not a big deal. To the people who are struggling, I really hope this post is not off-putting. I respect anyone's individual opinion, and I believe that anyone in active alcoholism/addiction should abstain from alcohol and drugs for a significant period of time. I would like to preface what I'm about to write by saying that I believe abstinence is the most effective way to change one's life for the better. Extensive abstinence is necessary to allow the body to heal itself and the brain to repair. But I have done an incredible amount of research because I still do not believe that alcoholism is an irreversible, incurable, black-and-white "disease." It has always felt wrong to me. There is just too much contradiction.<br />
<br />
Take, for example, the Cohen et al. (1971) study which demonstrated that alcoholic patients had the ability to control their drinking if provided sufficient incentives.<br />
<br />
<a href="http://www.bettertxoutcomes.org/bettertxoutcomes/PDF/Kellog-Stitzer.pdf">http://www.bettertxoutcomes.org/bettertxoutcomes/PDF/Kellog-Stitzer.pdf</a><br />
<div class="MsoNormal">
<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
“The studies by Cohen et al. (1971) demonstrated that
alcoholics could maintain control over their drinking if appropriate
contingencies were in place that supported non-alcoholic patterns of alcohol
ingestion.”<o:p></o:p></div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<b>The above statement
would not be possible if alcoholism were a brain disease characterized by
immediate and sustained loss of control. The Cohen et al. (1971) study
demonstrates that alcoholics DO HAVE willpower if appropriate incentives are
put in place. Again, this would not be possible based on the disease theory of
alcoholism.<o:p></o:p></b></div>
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<b><br /></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Take the next example of a Johns Hopkins study which demonstrated the same effect:</div>
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<a href="http://www.astrocyte-design.com/pseudoscience/alcoholism.html">http://www.astrocyte-design.com/pseudoscience/alcoholism.html</a><o:p></o:p></div>
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<br /></div>
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In a five-week experiment, inpatient subjects were given the
option to drink up to 10 ounces of alcohol every weekday. Every other week, the subjects were given
access to an improved environment – including telephone, television, pool
table, games, and reading materials – provided they drank fewer than 5 ounces
of alcohol for the day. If the subject
exceeded that amount, he was put in a more Spartan environment and was not
allowed to drink the following day. On
the alternate weeks, the subjects remained in ascetic environments no matter
how much they drank. All five subjects
drank less during the weeks when privileges were available than during the
weeks when no privileges were available.<o:p></o:p></div>
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<br /></div>
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A 1977 review of scientific literature cited 58 studies that
have corroborated the finding that alcoholic drinking is a function of
"environmental contingencies."<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<b>Again, these studies
CANNOT be possible if alcoholism triggers a complete loss of control and willpower and is a legitimate neurological malady!!<o:p></o:p></b></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal">
We quit because we have sufficient incentives to quit. No
scientist or alcohol researcher can point to a specific time at which the power
of choice is regained. Obviously, at some point alcoholics can choose not to
drink alcohol, despite the fact that they supposedly have a brain disease that
requires them to drink until their lives fall apart. What is also clear is that
alcoholics can go several days without drinking given sufficient circumstances. A common story you will hear in 12-step rooms is that a person relapsed for "one night." And then they abstained again for several months or years. That one night means that a person with a supposed disease controlled his or her drinking. That is because choice is never truly lost. Yes, when a person is physically
and psychologically dependent on a substance, he chooses to take that substance
to alleviate extreme discomfort. The key word in the previous sentence is that
he <b><i>chooses
</i></b>to take the substance. Any reasonable person who is in agony will
alleviate herself if the antidote is within reach. A person who is physically
and/or psychologically dependent on a substance most likely will need to
abstain from the substance for a period of time in order to regain control and
establish sufficient incentives to fix the problem behavior. The most important
thing for a dependent person to do is to realize that they have <b><i>agency
</i></b>in their life; the substance is not magic, and your desire for it is
not illogical. The most difficult thing for a person to do is to forget
everything about the “irreversibility” and the harmful label and the false notion
that the brain is hard-wired and will never return to “normal.” This is all
12-step, $45 billion a year treatment-industry dogma that was birthed out of the temperance and
prohibition eras. Almost 80 percent of people at inpatient treatment centers are not first-timers; treatment programs are designed to get repeat customers. It stems from religious zeal and the scare tactics used to
keep children from consuming drugs and alcohol. The brain does get conditioned
to pursue pleasurable activities, but all studies have found that after roughly
14 months brain functioning returns to near-normal levels in all respects.
Brain imaging shows this with methamphetamine users: (<a href="https://www.drugabuse.gov/publications/research-reports/methamphetamine/what-are-long-term-effects-methamphetamine-abuse">https://www.drugabuse.gov/publications/research-reports/methamphetamine/what-are-long-term-effects-methamphetamine-abuse</a>).
<o:p></o:p></div>
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<br /></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal">
In conclusion, please choose your own path. Perhaps abstinence is the right choice, but it shouldn't feel like the <u>only</u> choice. It should feel like an option. If you do decide to change your life, try staying sober for six months or a year. Create a real plan for moderation and put things in place to make it happen. Wait until you have reached a worthwhile place in life (have a job, a family, etc.). Please do not
let the identity of alcoholic or addict consume your entire life. Those who
have lived in AA for a long period of time are going to have the most difficult
time because their entire world view has been corroborated by other “alcoholics”
who have bought into the idea that they are completely powerless. My drinking became 10 times worse after being exposed to rehab and AA. Perhaps this is completely false. Perhaps I will be too scared to drink again. But as of right now this is how I feel. I think I have been psychologically corrupted by the idea that I have no agency whatsoever.<o:p></o:p></div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
If I do decide to drink again, I will be sure to share my experiences as objectively as possible. Sorry for the longest post of all time.</div>
Jonhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09427150728702226694noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6594224613487063780.post-50161282565866861032015-05-19T23:01:00.002-07:002015-12-07T09:36:50.471-08:00Seven Months on Baclofen<b>DOSE: </b>Baclofen 45 mg (10/10/10/15); Bupropion 300 mg (150/150).<br />
<br />
Wow, I had completely forgotten about this blog! Guess I should give an update so anyone who reads this knows I'm alive and well. I have been sober for eight months, and taking baclofen for seven of those eight months. I have tapered my dose down to 45 mg per day, and I experience practically no side effects. Since I had grown accustomed to high doses of baclofen, it is still occasionally difficult to fall asleep at night. I tapered my dose down pretty slowly, and stayed at 50mg until my semester ended. Baclofen has been amazing for maintaining abstinence. My life has completely changed. I was taking 19 units at my university, and working full-time, and I received As in all of my classes. I have already been offered full-time employment at two different companies, and things are just going great. I don't attend Alcoholic's Anonymous or any other support group. I do see a therapist once every two or three weeks, and that has helped me quite a bit. My mind is clear, and I'm really glad I lowered my dose to a manageable level because it would have been pretty rough to get off of it had my body grown accustomed to extremely high doses. I do have "cravings" every now and then, but that's life I guess. They are by no means overwhelming, and I can quickly brush them off and get on with my day. I also quit smoking cigarettes. It's been over four months since I've smoked, and I'm extremely grateful for that.<br />
<br />
I know that many people are attempting to use baclofen to try and drink normally. Trust me, I get it. Initially, that was my plan as well. But alcohol has caused so much damage and pain in my life that I have just accepted the fact that I can't drink it. The very fact that I <i>want </i>to drink something that has ruined my life tells me that my brain responds differently than others to alcohol. I have heard a couple amazing stories about high dose baclofen completely changing a person's life and allowing that person to "drink normally." But for every one of those stories, there are 10 stories of people who have had a nightmarish ride with baclofen, and they continue to drink alcoholically. Baclofen has truly changed my life, and allowed me to maintain my sobriety my own way. I finally have the ability to choose my own path instead of being force-fed something I don't believe in. I am not saying alcoholics should avoid baclofen, but I do think we should be safe about what we put into our bodies. Buying baclofen on the internet and taking 300mg every day is not a safe solution, no matter what one reads on an online study. I will try to keep people updated. I hope that everyone finds a way out of the alcoholic pit, because it's truly a horrible way to live. I hope that I can continue on the way I have been, but I never assume I am "cured."Jonhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09427150728702226694noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6594224613487063780.post-60354588339394829532015-01-11T18:22:00.000-08:002015-01-11T18:22:16.965-08:00Day 85<b>DOSE: </b>140 mg Baclofen (35/35/35/35); 300 mg Bupropion SR (150/150).<br />
<br />
<b>OTHER MEDICATION(S): </b>Multivitamin (1 tablet); Fish Oil (1 capsule)<br />
<br />
<b>SIDE EFFECTS: </b>Decreased alcohol cravings<br />
<br />
I have had some frightening thoughts over the past few days related to my self-administered high-dose baclofen treatment. I realized for the first time that I hadn't even thought about how or when I would be tapering off of baclofen, and whether or not that would be difficult. I'm now up to 140 mg/day, and I must say my cravings are practically nonexistent. However, I'm just afraid that if I continue for too long it could be a nightmare to get off of baclofen. I read some articles and blog threads recently of people who had horrendous experiences attempting to taper off of the drug, and some had severe health consequences which led them to hospitals, psych wards etc. What I'm saying is that I may have scared myself out of this venture, and I think I need to start working down my dose before I develop a high tolerance. It's unfortunate because I really think I might be close to reaching a point of complete suppression of alcohol cravings. The potential for danger just seems too great for me to continue for several more months or even a year. Also, I'm starting my next semester of school in a few days, and I want to make sure I'm mentally prepared for it. Baclofen also makes my muscles fatigue extremely easily, which makes working out far more challenging. Honestly I've reached a tolerance to the point where I have no negative side effects whatsoever other than muscle weakness, but it still seems risky.<br />
<br />
Overall, baclofen seems to have helped immensely for my alcohol cravings, but I need to lower my dose so that I can more successfully do other things in life. I'm planning on asking my doctor about being put on Antabuse, so that I won't really have the option of drinking without horrific vomiting and nausea. If my cravings return and reach an unbearable level, I will obviously taper down at a much slower rate. As of now, I'm planning on reducing my dose by 10 mg every three days. Perhaps somewhere down the line I will attempt to reach my "switch," and perhaps sometime in the near future they will create a modified version of baclofen for alcohol dependence and addiction, but for now I must be more cautious and make sure that my "experiment" doesn't end up costing me in the long run. I've been sober almost four months now, and I credit baclofen for that. In the end, my conclusion is that baclofen is highly effective in alleviating cravings, but it comes with the risk of developing physical dependence and it hinders one's ability to do other things. I may decide to start up again, and maybe I'm just freaked out after reading some of the horror stories of other people's experiences, but I think it's best for me to taper down. I'll post more about my experiences tapering down as well.Jonhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09427150728702226694noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6594224613487063780.post-775736261756529842015-01-01T22:07:00.001-08:002015-01-01T22:07:28.261-08:00Day 75<b>DOSE: </b>120 mg Baclofen (30/30/30/30); 300 mg Bupropion SR (150/150).<br />
<br />
<b>OTHER MEDICATION(S): </b>Multivitamin (1 tablet); Fish Oil (1 capsule)<br />
<br />
<b>SIDE EFFECTS: </b>Decreased alcohol cravings; slight headache<br />
<br />
I tapered off of my gabapentin over the past couple weeks, and I haven't noticed any significant difference without it. As I dropped in gabapentin dose I did have an increased urge to drink, but as I began to once again increase my baclofen, the cravings diminished. I've definitely still been having cravings, and I'm just not sure how baclofen alone can make me feel "indifferent" towards alcohol. I have become pretty reclusive, mainly because I have a hard time making friends as a sober college guy. I know that I need to branch out and make more friends in order to feel better about sobriety, but it has been difficult. I don't even know how to begin, and I've grown accustomed to living a very independent lifestyle. The days are extremely familiar and occasionally monotonous, but I'm still sober and that means I'm giving myself a chance to change my life. Baclofen will not make my life better. However it has made cravings considerably easier to deal with, and it's allowed me to focus on other aspects of my life. The bupropion has definitely also helped with elevating my mood and giving me more energy during the day. I will be starting my next semester of school in a couple of weeks, and I'm both excited and apprehensive about it. I think it's going to help a lot for me to fill my days and be more productive, but I'm unsure as to how baclofen will effect my abilities. If it proves to be much of a problem, I'm going to have to reduce the dose. The hard part about being sober is the fact that I no longer have an excuse to fail at life. I now have to realize that big changes have to take place in order for me to be happy, and it's a daunting thought. I'm planning to attend a SMART recovery meeting soon, and to start volunteering on my days off of school. In order to get out of myself I think I really need to begin helping other people and exploring the world. I've lived in my new city for nearly a year and a half, and I haven't explored much of it. I guess this blog entry has turned into more of a diary haha. Anyways, I've been sober for roughly three and a half months, and my life is getting better whether I choose to acknowledge it or not. It is my responsibility to take advantage of my new freedoms and what I choose to do with my life.<br />
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"God will not have his work made manifest by cowards." - Ralph Waldo EmersonJonhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09427150728702226694noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6594224613487063780.post-71766285911086575892014-12-21T22:02:00.001-08:002014-12-21T22:04:16.478-08:00Day 64<b>DOSE: </b>100 mg Baclofen (25/25/25/25); 900 mg Gabapentin (300/300/300); 300 mg Bupropion SR (150/150).<br />
<br />
<b>SIDE EFFECTS: </b>Decreased alcohol cravings.<br />
<br />
I'm sorry for not updating my blog more often. After beginning gabapentin I stopped increasing my baclofen dose, and therefore felt I was no longer living up to the blog's title. I had to take a makeup final exam earlier this week, and I think I did well on it. In order to study more successfully for my exam, I cut my gabapentin dose in half. I did this also because I couldn't tell if gabapentin was making a difference in my alcohol cravings. The wellbutrin (bupropion) has been effective at giving me more energy during the day, and since I've been at the same baclofen dose for several weeks now I am experiencing literally no side effects from it, or from any of the other medications. After I reduced my gabapentin dose, I initally noticed a slight return of cravings, but that has since diminished. By no means have I reached the highly sought after "indifference" to alcohol. I still have drinking urges, but they have not yet been severe by any means. I haven't had any moment that I would consider a "close call", and I'm able to function productively. In the next few days I may stop taking gabapentin completely, and start slowly increasing my baclofen dose once again. I've been sober for over three months now, and I'm proud of that. Reaching this point is not new to me, but it's definitely worthwhile. However I need to continue to work on the social and psychological aspects of alcoholism, and start to branch out and find support networks. I'll be starting my next semester of classes in the coming weeks, and that will surely bring about quite a bit of stress and anxiety. So hopefully I can have a network of supportive people in place by the time school starts. Aside from that, not too much to report. I'm back home once again for the holidays, which is always stressful. But it is good to see my family again. Back in Arizona I've become somewhat reclusive, and I know that I need to change that habit in order to maintain enjoyable sobriety. It is good to know that if I stick to one dose of baclofen for long enough I can reach a point where I feel no side effects other than reduced alcohol cravings.<br />
<br />
Hope everyone has a happy holidays!Jonhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09427150728702226694noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6594224613487063780.post-87125118425371018902014-12-06T11:43:00.000-08:002014-12-06T11:43:56.222-08:00Day 49<b>DOSE: </b>100 mg Baclofen (25/10/20/20/25); 1,800 mg Gabapentin (600/600/600); 300 mg Bupropion SR (150/150).<br />
<br />
<b>OTHER MEDICATION(S):</b> Multivitamin (1 tablet); Fish Oil (1 capsule).<br />
<br />
<b>SIDE EFFECTS: </b>Short-term memory lapses; mild anxiety; slightly decreased alcohol cravings.<br />
<br />
Well now I'm on quite a cocktail of medications. After meeting with my psychiatrist a few days ago, we decided to add Wellbutrin (generic Bupropion) to the mix to combat tiredness and memory problems. He was reluctant to prescribe a stimulant (for good reason), and so far bupropion has most definitely helped with tiredness. I've been researching gabapentin, and memory problems is not a listed side effect. Perhaps it's just a lack of focus and motivation that is causing me to have trouble retaining information. The reason I took an extra 10 mg today is because I was feeling really anxious and having some cravings. It's kind of frightening that my cravings are returning, and I'm not sure what's causing it. The past couple days it's been pretty bad, but I am able to recall how terrible my life was when drinking and could easily say no. For about the first month out of treatment my cravings were practically nonexistent, so I'm thinking that gabapentin may actually be making things worse. For now I'm just going to continue doing what I'm doing and hope that things get better as my body continues to adjust to these medications.<br />
<br />
I finally stopped procrastinating on an assignment that I had to complete in order to finish one of my makeup classes, and that has helped to alleviate some pressure at least. However I still have the big exam to take, and that continues to cause a lot of stress. I'm still sober which is obviously the most important part, and I plan to stay that way. The side effects have pretty much all abated, except for the ones I've listed above. Regardless of anything, I'm extremely happy about the fact that medications for alcoholism are being researched and tested. I'll post more later!Jonhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09427150728702226694noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6594224613487063780.post-37929473940422837412014-11-27T17:02:00.002-08:002014-11-27T17:02:54.626-08:00Day 40<b>DOSE: </b>80 mg Baclofen (20/20/20/20); 1,500 mg Gabapentin (600/300/600).<br />
<br />
<b>OTHER MEDICATION(S):</b> Multivitamin (1 tablet).<br />
<br />
<b>SIDE EFFECTS: </b>Headache in the morning; short-term memory lapses; somnolence; decreased alcohol cravings.<br />
<br />
I haven't posted in a little while, and that's because I've taken a slight detour on my baclofen journey. I met with a psychiatrist about a week ago hoping to get an increased prescription for my baclofen use so I don't have to supplement my dose through other means. However, after meeting with the psychiatrist, he insisted that I try gabapentin, another off-label alcoholism drug. So I've been titrating up on gabapentin, but because it makes me drowsy too I had to reduce my baclofen intake so I could tolerate both. In the past few days I've noticed a frightening return of cravings, and I'm unable to determine whether it's from taking gabapentin or from reducing the amount of baclofen I'm taking. I was up to 110 mg/day of baclofen when I began gabapentin, and I quickly dropped the amount of baclofen to 80 mg, which could well be the cause of my recent drinking urges. Regardless, I'm still sober! I drove home for Thanksgiving yesterday, and I became very tired near the end of my drive, to the point that I almost thought I couldn't continue! However, I bought some coffee and snapped out of it. So I'm a little nervous about changing my game plan to include gabapentin, but I want to give it a fair chance and see if it helps me reach a point of indifference towards alcohol. The few studies that I've read about the efficacy of gabapentin in reducing cravings seem promising, and if it doesn't work out I will simply return to my original baclofen titration schedule. Anyways, getting ready for a delicious Thanksgiving dinner with my family, so I should probably get going. Also, today I haven't had any cravings whatsoever, so hopefully that will continue as my body adjusts to this new medication. Happy holidays!Jonhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09427150728702226694noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6594224613487063780.post-72111839602423682862014-11-17T18:38:00.002-08:002014-11-17T18:38:41.158-08:00Day 30<b>DOSE: </b>100 mg Baclofen (Brand name <i>Fexobac)</i> (25/25/25/25).<br />
<br />
<b>OTHER MEDICATION(S):</b> Multivitamin (1 tablet). Omega 3 Fish Oil (1 capsule).<br />
<br />
<b>SIDE EFFECTS: </b>Slight headache in the morning; somnolence; decreased alcohol cravings.<br />
<br />
I'm finally in triple digits on my high-dose baclofen experience, and so far I have not experienced practically any of the negative side effects that I had heard so much about. It's my third day at 100mg, and I am still feeling tired at certain points throughout the day. Normally the somnolence wears off after the second day of a dose increase, but so far I'm still wanting to take an occasional nap. But it's definitely worth it, because so far today <u>I haven't had a single craving for alcohol</u>! Or if I have it's been so minor that I can't even remember it. Regardless, I'm feeling good about where I'm at. When I'm working out at the gym, I notice some slight muscle weakness, but it hasn't been too much of a hindrance so far. I'm still sober, and since I'm not counting individual days but rather the 20th of each month, I'll have two months sober in just three days! This will not be the first, or second time I've been sober for two months, but it will be the longest amount of time I've been sober without attending Alcoholic's Anonymous meetings. It just feels good to be choosing my own path, and attempting to use a medical treatment for a medical problem, as opposed to a dogmatic, theological approach to the treatment of alcoholism. However I am participating in an outpatient program and attending therapy sessions. I'm still noticing that it's hard to get myself motivated to do things that I really need to get done, but I really need to just buckle down and do it. I'm also playing on an intramural soccer team, and I'm still experiencing muscle cramping when I sprint or exert a lot of energy. Now that tiredness is becoming more common, I might start titrating up more slowly, perhaps every five days as the dosage gets higher. I've also started taking the larger dose (if there is one) in the morning and before bed so as to avoid sleepiness. Anyways, not much more to report on that front. Life is slowly starting to come back together, and I'm optimistic about baclofen. I'm also extremely grateful that I'm not experiencing crazy symptoms like insomnia, or itching, or anything else like that. Goodnight.Jonhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09427150728702226694noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6594224613487063780.post-32132042672797221332014-11-10T21:17:00.000-08:002014-11-10T21:17:40.164-08:00Day 23<b>DOSE: </b>80 mg Baclofen (Brand name <i>Fexobac)</i> (20/20/20/20).<br />
<br />
<b>OTHER MEDICATION(S):</b> Multivitamin (1 tablet). Omega 3 Fish Oil (1 capsule).<br />
<br />
<b>SIDE EFFECTS: </b>Mood changes; somnolence; slightly decreased alcohol cravings.<br />
<br />
Haven't posted in a little while. I've noticed a slight decrease in my motivation to get things done. Also, this morning and afternoon I was in a terrible mood, and found myself extremely stressed out over seemingly minor situations. A few days ago I bought a new car, which was a hellish process but I absolutely love my new vehicle! However I think the baclofen has made me hyper-sensitive to stressful situations, and over the weekend I noticed a strong desire to drink. The feeling came back again this morning, so I'm a bit frightened because that's usually how I feel before I relapse. I'm still sober though, and I'll have two months sober on the 20th! Also, I play on an intramural soccer team, and my leg muscles started cramping continuously to the point that I couldn't even play the game. I have to assume this is also a side effect of baclofen. My sleep is still good other than the fact that I wake up early in the morning (not early to most people, around 6 a.m.), and I'm unable to fall back asleep once I wake up. My kitty is doing well. She runs around constantly now and bugs the hell out of me. All in all I'm still optimistic about reaching a state of indifference toward alcohol through high-dose baclofen. Tomorrow I'll be increasing my dose to 90 mg. I've slowed my titration to an increase of 10 mg every four days, and if I continue to feel tired during the day I will slow it even more. The side effects are not nearly as bad as several other users have reported, so I'm happy about that. Anyways, just wanted to post an update. Alcohol cravings are most definitely not gone, but I only experience them in situations of high stress. During usual day-to-day activities, I have noticed that I'm hardly ever thinking about alcohol. I'll post more in the days to come!Jonhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09427150728702226694noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6594224613487063780.post-33076105550393506322014-11-04T20:01:00.000-08:002014-11-04T20:01:06.446-08:00Day 17<b>DOSE: </b>70 mg Baclofen (Brand name <i>Fexobac)</i> (20/15/20/15).<br />
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<b>OTHER MEDICATION(S):</b> Multivitamin (1 tablet). Omega 3 Fish Oil (1 capsule).<br />
<br />
<b>SIDE EFFECTS: </b>Slight mood changes; headache; somnolence; slightly decreased alcohol cravings.<br />
<br />
Today I increased my dose another 10 mg, reaching the 70 mg mark and going strong! Many people claim that around this dosage and higher are when problems and debilitating side effects can occur, so I'm a little nervous about that. This morning when I took the 20 mg dose I felt pretty tired, but I think that's also because my new kitten has been keeping me awake with her crying at night. Anyways, I know that very few people read this blog, but it's helpful for me to be able to look back on my progress and experiences. I noticed increased tiredness and markedly reduced alcohol cravings. However just about an hour ago I had what seemed like a wave of anxiety brush over me, and the effects of that have persisted for a while. Overall the side effects have not been too negative at all, and I'm still sleeping great aside from strange dreams. I've also noticed that I'm waking up slightly earlier than usual. Not a big deal though. I'm getting a little nervous thinking about how high I should go with baclofen, and whether or not "indifference" is attainable. Still hopeful and happy and healthy. I'm sure I could write a lot more about a bunch of random stuff, but now I'm just going to kick back, watch The Walking Dead and cuddle with my new kitty! Goodnight.Jonhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09427150728702226694noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6594224613487063780.post-10694344662840365502014-11-01T22:02:00.000-07:002014-11-01T22:02:32.430-07:00Day 14<b>DOSE: </b>60 mg Baclofen (15/15/15/15).<br />
<br />
<b>OTHER MEDICATION(S):</b> Multivitamin (1 tablet). Omega 3 Fish Oil (1 capsule).<br />
<br />
<b>SIDE EFFECTS: </b>Slight mood changes; headache; slightly decreased alcohol cravings.<br />
<br />
These past few days have been quite an emotional roller-coaster. On Wednesday night my car broke down as I was driving home to watch Game 7 of the World Series (I'm a huge San Francisco Giants fan), and I would later come to find out that my transmission is busted and it's a $1700 repair. So needless to say I've been pretty stressed out about that. I was forced to miss my IOP appointment on Thursday due to my lack of transportation, and began to experience some increased cravings and anxiety. Many people have experienced a "honeymoon" effect with baclofen, where their cravings completely disappear at the beginning but begin to return after a little while. That has been my experience to some extent. I'm still sober, which is all that matters, but I have noticed some increased anxiety and an increased desire to drink. However these feelings have been in no way overwhelming. I felt pretty jealous last night as I watched everyone celebrate Halloween while I sat at home, sober, feeling incapable of participating. I just chalked this holiday up as a loss and figure that I'll have a bunch more Halloweens once I've maintained sobriety for a considerable period of time. Anyways, I'm up to 60 mg and not experiencing hardly any negative side effects from baclofen. The only things I've noticed are that my bruxism (jaw clenching) may actually be getting worse due to baclofen, and I find myself unable to go back to sleep when I wake up, and I'm typically waking up around 7 a.m. All that's important to me is my sobriety, and for now I have successfully maintained that. Oh, on a completely random note, I adopted a kitten today in an impulsive act of foolishness, but I think she will have quite a bit of therapeutic value once I get used to having a little critter running around. I'm still optimistic about the future, and looking forward to my continued journey with baclofen.Jonhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09427150728702226694noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6594224613487063780.post-78190058091496057972014-10-28T22:01:00.002-07:002014-10-28T22:01:32.701-07:00Day Ten<b>DOSE: </b>40 mg Baclofen (10/10/10/10).<br />
<br />
<b>OTHER MEDICATION(S):</b> Multivitamin (1 tablet). Omega 3 Fish Oil (1 capsule).<br />
<br />
<b>SIDE EFFECTS: </b>Slight mood changes; decreased alcohol cravings.<br />
<br />
Tomorrow I will be increasing my dose to 50 mg, and I've decided to go up every three days due to the fact that I haven't had any limiting side effects. Yesterday I was having some strange mood swings and occasional cravings for alcohol, which frustrated me because prior to that I hadn't been experiencing hardly any cravings. I've also been getting anxious about a job interview that I have tomorrow morning. I've been noticing that in stressful situations I think baclofen actually makes me more anxious, not less like some people have experienced. However that feeling usually subsides after about 20 minutes. Overall I'd still take any of this over intolerable alcohol cravings and that lurking sensation of feeling "trapped" into sobriety. I started my intensive outpatient program yesterday, and I'm looking forward to continuing to attend those groups as well as beginning individual therapy sessions. Baclofen is doing about as much as a pill can do so far, but I still need to address underlying issues in order to have meaningful, lasting sobriety. Or is that the AA talking? Occasionally I'll notice myself drifting into feelings of regret about foolish past behaviors while drunk. I've done some incredibly ridiculous things while intoxicated, but it really serves no purpose to dwell on any of it. Anyways, I'm 38 days sober and feeling great! The only thing on my mind is this stupid interview tomorrow, and for some reason I just can't help but thinking I'm going to fail miserably. All I can do is show up and be myself and hope for the best. I'm sorry for these boring, monotonous blog entries, I'll try to spice things up as I get used to this whole process.<br />
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And just to repeat for anyone who is curious about my dosing schedule:<br />
<br />
1st dose: 7 - 8:30 a.m. (depending on when I wake up)<br />
2nd dose: 1 - 1:30 p.m.<br />
3rd dose: 6 - 6:30 p.m.<br />
4th dose: 10 - 11:30 p.m. (depending on when I go to sleep)<br />
<br />
This schedule is working great for me so far, and when I increase I take the larger dose in the morning and in the evening because the afternoons are the only times I occasionally experience tiredness from baclofen. I'll post again soon!Jonhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09427150728702226694noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6594224613487063780.post-80482558703146118872014-10-26T22:22:00.001-07:002014-10-26T22:26:31.686-07:00Day Eight<b>DOSE: </b>40 mg Baclofen (10/10/10/10).<br />
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<b>OTHER MEDICATION(S):</b> Multivitamin (1 tablet). Omega 3 Fish Oil (1 capsule).<br />
<br />
<b>SIDE EFFECTS: </b>Slight mood changes; decreased alcohol cravings.<br />
<br />
Another positive day today. I have been increasing the dosage slightly more quickly than I had originally planned, but as of yet I haven't noticed any tough negative side effects. The somnolence has completely gone away, and I've only noticed occasional mood swings and some infrequent headaches. It's well worth it because even at such a relatively low dose, I am not having many alcohol cravings. I really do need to get involved in some volunteer work or something, because I need to fill my days a bit more. Tomorrow I'll be starting my outpatient program, and I'm hoping to make some sober friends through those meetings. I still haven't attended an AA meeting, but it hasn't been an issue yet. I've just been to so many meetings, for so long now, that I am almost repulsed by the idea of returning. Realistically, though, shame and embarrassment is definitely playing a role in my reluctance to return. Ultimately, I just need to join in on some sober leisure activities like sports teams or hiking, etc. The 40 mg dose will have to carry out for at least four days, because I need to have enough to last until my next refill. Oh, one other thing I've noticed in terms of side effects is that I've been finding myself waking up with a slight headache around 7 a.m. and finding it difficult to fall back asleep. I usually take my last dose around 10:30 p.m., so perhaps my body is reacting to the fact that it doesn't have any baclofen coursing through its system. However the positive effects far outweigh any negative consequences to this point, and I'm very pleased with the results. In terms of past anti-craving medications, I've taken Wellbutrin, Campral, Naltrexone and Antabuse, none of which had any real noticeable impact. Wellbutrin helped some, at least with my depression, but other than that not really.<br />
<br />
All in all, I'm really optimistic about baclofen. I'm a little nervous that I may be developing a tolerance too quickly, and that the generic form of the drug may be less powerful than the brand name version. However, I think I'm just reading too much into little details. I'm still <b><u>happily</u></b> sober, and that's all that matters! Goodnight.Jonhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09427150728702226694noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6594224613487063780.post-46501251359035632242014-10-24T21:52:00.001-07:002014-10-24T21:52:50.142-07:00Day Six<b>DOSE: </b>30 mg Baclofen (10/5/10/5).<br />
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<b>OTHER MEDICATION(S):</b> Multivitamin (1 tablet). Omega 3 Fish Oil (1 capsule).<br />
<br />
<b>SIDE EFFECTS: </b>Headache; slight mood changes; decreased alcohol cravings.<br />
<br />
So far my body has been very receptive to baclofen, and I'm hardly experiencing any real negative side effects. I think I'm going to speed up my schedule a little bit and see if everything continues to go well. Since I was getting tired in the middle of the day, I've switched up my dosages a little bit so I'm taking less in the afternoon. I took 10 mg at 8:30 am, 5 mg at 1:30 p.m., 10 mg at 6:30 p.m., and I'll be taking 5 mg before bed. Baclofen has been helping me sleep, which has been great because I had read several experiences of people having insomnia due to baclofen use. Today was my second day at 30 mg, and either tomorrow or the next day I'm going to increase the dose to 40 mg. I went to my assessment interview for my outpatient treatment program, and I start on Monday. I'm looking forward to that. Sorry I'm rushing this entry because I really don't feel like writing anything tonight. Even at such a low dose, I am definitely feeling positive benefits from baclofen in terms of both decreased alcohol cravings and just an overall sense of well-being. I think it was extremely helpful that I had already been sober for a month before beginning. It has been highly recommended from experts in baclofen therapy for alcoholism that at least a few days of abstinence take place before beginning the regimen. Obviously for some people this isn't possible, and I know that when I'm in active alcoholism I'm never sober for more than an hour, let alone a day or two. I'm excited to continue pushing forward and to incrementally up my dose until I feel completely satisfied with the results. Again, I apologize for the sloppy entry tonight, but I just feel like sitting back and watching some TV before bed. Looking forward to tomorrow!Jonhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09427150728702226694noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6594224613487063780.post-82399592274422465082014-10-22T20:58:00.000-07:002014-10-22T20:58:10.695-07:00Day Four<b>DOSE: </b>20 mg Baclofen (5/5/5/5).<br />
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<b>OTHER MEDICATION(S):</b> Multivitamin (1 tablet). Omega 3 Fish Oil (1 capsule).<br />
<br />
<b>SIDE EFFECTS: </b>Headache; mild somnolence; decreased alcohol cravings.<br />
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I had a somewhat interesting day today. Last night I decided to take an extra 5 mg of baclofen before bed because that morning I noticed what seemed to be a slight baclofen "hangover" from not having it in my system for several hours. It worked well and I slept great once again, so I'm going to do that again tonight. Tomorrow I will increase my dose to 30 mg, and I'm a little nervous about that but also excited. Overall I felt good today in terms of the effects of baclofen on my alcohol cravings, but I did experience noticeable tiredness after lunch, around 1:30 p.m. I took a nap and found it very difficult to shake off the feeling of somnolence and lethargy after I woke up. Eventually that feeling wore off and I felt fine, but it was a strange experience. My days are pretty slow since I'm not in school or working right now, so I need to find some new activities to fill my days. I believe this is where a program such as Alcoholic's Anonymous would come in handy, because a pill obviously can't address the social and environmental aspects of alcoholism. Next week I will be starting an outpatient treatment program that meets three times a week for three hours. Hopefully I'll be able to make some sober friends there and start participating in fun, sober leisure activities. My intramural sports team will also begin next week, and I'm excited for that. I have also noticed mild headaches at various times throughout the day, but this could be a result of my bruxism (jaw clenching). Part of me was hoping that baclofen, being a muscle relaxant, might alleviate some of my jaw clenching/teeth grinding, but it hasn't done so yet.<br />
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In all, today was a positive day and I'm still feeling very good about my baclofen adventure. Some marked tiredness, mild headaches, and very slight mood changes are all that have occurred in terms of side effects so far. I hope that as I increase my dose, the side effects don't get to be too much. I just read (Oct. 22, 2014) that the University of North Carolina is seeking volunteers for a controlled study of baclofen use for the treatment of alcoholism, so I will definitely be keeping up with those developments. My guess is that within five years scientists will have changed the molecular makeup of baclofen just enough to be able to market it as a new drug and thus allow pharmaceutical companies to profit from it. Due to the fact that baclofen is a relatively old drug, all of its patents have expired, so big-name drug companies can't make money on it. That is the only reason I can see for why it is not being focused on more in the treatment of alcoholism.<br />
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Anyways, I'll post more in the next day or two. I'm 33 days sober, and things are going well!Jonhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09427150728702226694noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6594224613487063780.post-43639858831394035312014-10-20T21:52:00.002-07:002014-10-20T21:52:44.302-07:00Day Two<b>DOSE: </b>15 mg Baclofen (5/5/5).<br />
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<b>OTHER MEDICATION(S):</b> Multivitamin (1 tablet). Omega 3 Fish Oil (1 capsule).<br />
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<b>SIDE EFFECTS: </b>Mild nausea; mild muscle weakness; decreased alcohol cravings.<br />
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It's only the second day of my baclofen schedule, but I noticed some positive changes in my mood and alcohol cravings. I slept great last night, apart from some pretty bizarre dreams. After experiencing some uncomfortable side effects from such a low dose (10 mg) yesterday, I was wary about my future with baclofen. However, today went much better. I took my first 5 mg at 9 a.m. with breakfast, and did not notice any tiredness like the day before. I noticed a lack in motivation for a short period, but was still able to take care of a lot of errands and household chores. After eating lunch around 1:30 p.m. I took my second 5 mg dose, and noticed that I was in a good mood and had not been experiencing hardly any alcohol cravings. A few hours after that I went to the gym, and noticed some slight muscle fatigue, a side effect commonly attributed to baclofen use. I took my third 5 mg dose around 7 p.m., and was able to relax and watch some T.V. after a busy day of running around and taking care of small tasks. Due to my recent relapse, I was forced to take a medical leave of absence from the university I attend, so I have a lot of free time on my hands. I have been spreading out my doses based on other clinical trials and the fact that baclofen only stays active in the body for approximately four hours after ingestion.<br />
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I'm going to stay on my 15 mg dose for three more days, and then I will begin increasing the amount by 10 mg every five days. I have read about many unpleasant side effects of baclofen as a result of moving up too quickly, which is why I'm choosing to go slowly. Overall, today has left me feeling far more optimistic about my journey using baclofen therapy to treat my alcoholism. I'm still debating whether or not I should return to Alcoholic's Anonymous to supplement my recovery process, but I've been in-and-out of the rooms for so long now that the thought of going back to meetings is almost repulsive. I did notice that I've been smoking more cigarettes than usual, but that could be more from boredom than anything else. It's only the second day, but I'm looking forward to tomorrow. I will most likely skip a few days of posting updates so as to avoid tiresome repetition, but will definitely continue to share my progress often.<br />
<br />Jonhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09427150728702226694noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6594224613487063780.post-77577481878031998852014-10-19T21:48:00.000-07:002014-10-21T10:19:25.268-07:00Day One<b>DOSE:</b> 10 mg Baclofen (5/5) (Brand name <i>Fexobac, </i>generic for <i>Lioresal)</i>.<br />
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<b>RELATIVE FACTORS: </b>Gender: Male ; Weight: 170lbs<br />
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<b>OTHER MEDICATION(S):</b> Multivitamin (1 tablet). Omega 3 Fish Oil (1 capsule).</div>
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<b>SIDE EFFECTS:</b> Mild somnolence; mild mood changes; increased alcohol cravings (read below).</div>
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Due to circumstance, I began my Baclofen intake at 2 p.m. by ingesting 5 mg orally. I have been completely sober for exactly one month today, so I noticed the effects of Baclofen after approximately 30 minutes. I felt more relaxed, somewhat tired, and experienced mild mental "fog." I was just released from a 30-day inpatient treatment facility for my alcoholism, so my stress and anxiety level was increased due to the initial shock of being back in my old environment. I believe that fact played more of a role in my increased alcohol cravings than that of the Baclofen, however I think it should be mentioned regardless. I took another 5 mg at 7 p.m., and did not notice the Baclofen nearly as much as the first dose. It is now 9:40 p.m., and I feel a little sleepy. I am somewhat concerned about sleep, but will report back tomorrow. From this point on I am going to take 15 mg of Baclofen distributed in 5 mg doses three times per day for the next four days before increasing the amount. It is only the first day, so I did not expect any positive results from such a low dose. I had quit smoking cigarettes for two weeks during my treatment, however due to the stress of being home I began smoking again. I am not sure if Baclofen had any impact on this decision.</div>
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I remain optimistic, but also fearful. Alcohol has taken everything from me, and I will do anything to overcome it. If you are suffering from alcoholism or addiction, feel free to contact me and share your experiences. I would love to hear from you, so please comment below. I will continue to post about my journey as often as possible, and will try to be as detailed and meticulous as I can in regards to relevant information.</div>
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All the best.</div>
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Jonhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09427150728702226694noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6594224613487063780.post-30112928475663335802014-10-19T19:08:00.004-07:002014-10-21T10:18:25.859-07:00RelapseLast month, on September 6, I relapsed. I immediately spiraled into out-of-control binge drinking once again, and within a week I was in a hospital detoxing. I stopped eating, showering, drinking water, and ceased doing anything else to take care of myself. I almost died twice in less than three weeks, and the final time I went to the hospital my B.A.C. was over .45 coupled with the fact that I had consumed 15 mg of Ativan that was prescribed to me after my previous hospitalization. After roughly three weeks, I woke up in a treatment center with no knowledge of how I got there or what had taken place anytime before that moment. Again.<br />
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I just discharged today, and I am now going to try to use high-dose Baclofen therapy to save my own life. This is my last chance at survival. I am documenting this in a vain attempt to help others. Alcoholism has proven so devastating, so horrific, that I simply do not know what else to do. I am going to die if I can't maintain complete abstinence from alcohol and other drugs. I doubt hardly anyone will ever read this, but to those few who do stumble on this blog, I hope you find it helpful.Jonhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09427150728702226694noreply@blogger.com0